Oasis isn’t just a terrible band from the 90’s with a front man who had more attitude than ability. (Full disclosure – I still like their song “Wonder Wall.”)
An oasis is something that is off in the distance that offers hope. It is a watering hole in the desert. It is dreaming of a beach vacation in the dead of winter. It is a meal at the end of a fast.
An oasis is the promise of something greater than what we are currently enduring. We all need a carrot of hope dangling in front of us to get us through tough times.
Sometimes the valleys through which we travel may not be that tough. We may simply find ourselves stuck in an emotional, spiritual or relational rut. The days run together, and gray skies seem to linger incessantly.
Other times we find ourselves treading some very rough roads. We must deal with loss, disappointment, unfulfilled dreams, betrayal, illness or other forms of brokenness that make it difficult to even find the motivation to get out of bed.
Whether we’re just feeling the winter blues or we’re living through hell, we all need hope. I know because the last decade of my life has seen both of these seasons.
I’ve had times when it was difficult to distinguish one day from the next, when finding motivation was challenging. And I’ve trudged through some painful, dark valleys brought on by the loss of my sister and the near loss of my marriage, when I found it difficult to even put one foot in front of the other.
What got me through both seasons was hope. It was the recognition that life is a series of peaks and valleys, and no matter how deep the valley, it can’t last forever.
I wasn’t always a believer in the Bible, but a particularly long dark stretch brought me to the Word seeking hope. What I found within its pages were story after story about people who endured hardship and thrived in the face of it.
There were no promises of easy lives. But there were many promises that we will be shepherded through difficulty, that hardship can change us for the better and that we have access to strength beyond what we think possible.
Even after emerging from the darkest period of my life, I still find myself in seasons where I struggle to find joy. If you’ve lived through winter in Ohio, you probably know what I’m talking about.
To get through these seasons, I have to find little oases in my life. I look for glimmers of hope. I remind myself that spring always comes after winter.
One of the ways I do that in my marriage is by scheduling what my wife and I call an ‘annual abandon.’ We go on overnight trips without our kids. It’s a break from the routine and gives us something to look forward to.
We also enjoy date nights with some regularity. We try to make these dates happen monthly, but it can be difficult with two young kids and limited baby-sitting options.
I also look for small daily oases. They come in the form of prayer/meditation in the morning, family time in the evening, home-cooked meals, walking my dog, holding hands with my wife while watching TV or movie nights with the kids.
They aren’t extravagant events, but these simple moments bring joy and make the stress and drudgery of work all worth it.
If you are simply stuck or drowning in darkness, I encourage you to find your own glimmers of hope. Even if an annual abandon is outside of your scope at the moment, look for an oasis each day.
There is so much joy and wonder in the world if you look at it right. Figure out what brings you joy. Focus on it, and move towards it.
